I'm movin' on...

I'm Moving On
RASCAL FLATTS

I've dealt with my ghosts and I've faced all my demons
Finally content with a past I regret
I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness
For once I'm at peace with myself
I've been burdened with blame,
trapped in the past for too long
I'm movin' on

I've lived in this place and I know all the faces
Each one is different but they're always the same
They mean me no harm but it's time that I face it
They'll never allow me to change
But I never dreamed home would end up where I don't belong
I'm movin' on

I'm movin' on
At last I can see life has been patiently waiting for me
And I know there's no guarantees, but I'm not alone
There comes a time in everyone's life
When all you can see are the years passing by
And I have made up my mind that those days are gone

I sold what I could and packed what I couldn't
Stopped to fill up on my way out of town
I've loved like I should but lived like I shouldn't
I had to lose everything to find out
Maybe forgiveness will find me somewhere down this road
I'm movin' on

I'm movin' on
I'm movin' on

Everybody's broken...

It is rare that words fail me. Seldom am I speechless. Often, when I cannot find my own words, I find that someone has already penned my every thought, my deepest feelings, my darkest fears and my greatest triumphs. For every situation in life, there is a song, a lyric that fits. Better than Hallmark, I can always say what I want with the words of some poet.

I'm rambling on so, of course, I don't have the words to express myself today. I've been feeling anxious and grumpy and discontent overall lately. Sometimes, when you think you're at the end of your rope and just barely hanging on, someone unties the other end.

If you read this and it makes no sense to you, it's OK, it wasn't really meant for you. There are maybe 2 or 3 people who will understand a majority of this post. Some people may identify with something in here on a personal level, unrelated to my own struggles. That is the power of a good lyric or poem I think.

For those few who know...

Hey God - Tell me what the hell is going on
It seems like all the good shit's gone
It keeps on getting harder hanging on
Hey God, there's nights you know I want to scream
These days you're even harder to believe
I know how busy you must be, but Hey God...
Do you ever think about me
-- Bon Jovi, "Hey God"

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I lost all faith in my God, in his religion too
I told the angels they could sing their songs to someone new
I lost all trust in my friends
I watched my heart turn to stone
I thought that I was left to walk this wicked world alone

Tonight I'll dust myself off
Tonight I'll suck my gut in
I'll face the night and I'll pretend
I got something to believe in...
-- Bon Jovi, "Something to Believe In"

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It's OK, to be a little broken
Everybody's broken, in this life
It's OK, to feel a little broken
Everybody's broken, you're alright
It's just life

Step into the deep end
Make yourself at home
When you wonder why you're breathing
Know you're not alone
It's so hard to believe
It's easier to doubt
You're trying to hold in
But you're dying to scream out
-- Bon Jovi, "Everybody's Broken"

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See I bleed & I bruise, oh, but what's it to you
I'm only human on the inside
And if looks could deceive,
Make it hard to believe
I'm only human on the inside

I crash & I burn, maybe some day you will learn
I'm only human on the inside
I stumble & fall, baby, under it all
I'm only human on the inside
-- The Pretenders, "Human"

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I've built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

Don't talk of love,
But I've heard the words before;
It's sleeping in my memory.
I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

And a rock feels no pain;
And an island never cries.
-- Simon & Garfunkel, "I Am a Rock"

I'm sure I could sit here and find a few dozen more that fit the turmoil inside my head but I must at least feign sleep before I struggle to play nice at Kindergarten tomorrow (oops, later today).
If you read something here that you feel like it was meant for you, maybe it was... or maybe we are going through something similar. Maybe we aren't so different. Maybe we aren't so alone.